Chapter 43: ADOI Pilgrimage; Walls, walls, down you go!
ADOI: Pilgrimage
Part 2: Walls, walls, down you go
*At the Caverns Of Chaos*
Jipostus: YAY! *Kicks down wall* This is surely fun!
Goblin: Stop it! You're destroying our cavern!
Jipostus: So? I have fun ^_^
Goblin: *sigh* You need help...
*Goblin kickage later*
Goblin: x_x
Jipostus: Now... Back to kicking walls...
Hobgoblin: NO! Stop kicking walls!
Jipostus: No, I won't stop! *Kicks hobgoblin between legs*
Hobgoblin: Owwwwww... Ahh... Behind that... Wall... Is... *Dies*
Jipostus: Whatta fuck was he babbling about? Oh well... *Kicks down wall*
Group of golems: Finally, someone stupid enough released us! As our gratidute, you shall get a quick death!
Jipostus: OMFG! *Tries to build wall back, but gets pushed away by crystal golem*
Crystal golem: You have released us from this "prison"... We thank you... You shall get quick death as a gift...
Jipostus: Take this! *Kicks crystal golem, and runs away*
Crystal golem: OW! *Tramples, and so do the others*
Stone golem: Don't let him get away!
Crystal golem: Too late... He has already descended...
Other golems: Aww...
*At Dwarftown*
Jipostus: Phew.. That was close... Now... Oh, a town... Finally some civilisation...
Dwarf 1: And again a new adventurer? It's been busy year...
Dwarf 2: Yea... *Drinks ale*
Jipostus: ... Why... Do... I... Feel... Like... I... Should... Just... Make end of this bullshit!
Dwarves: SILENCE!
Jipostus: ... I need a drink...
Dwarf 3: Just shut up!
Jipostus: Fine... Hey, there must be something *notes dwarf elite guards*
Dwarf elite guard: Thou shall not see Thrundarr, he's busy now.
Jipostus: ...This totally sucks... Hey, staircase.
*Descends*
Jipostus: This is totally retarded... Everything is done, and I can't get anything from anywhere...
Kobold: You are just doomed...
Jipostus: SHUT THE FUCK UP!
*Sweeps, making kobold trample and break his skull*
Kobold: x_X
Jipostus: Thou shall not mess with me... Ow... Now i got headache...
*elsewhere*
Ssraxx: Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe...
Onn: Stop playing with that monk, and play cards!
Istaria: Yea!
Ssraxx: Aww... I just want to make him to speak properly, not like that fighter paladin of yours...
Onn: Just shut up and play cards!
Ssraxx: Fine... He should speak properly now...
*Caverns Of Chaos*
Jipostus: ARGH! THIS HEADACHE IS KILLING ME! WHAT'S THAT? POTION?!
*Potion drinkage later*
Jipostus: Great! Pure dwarven ale! Hey, headache is gone... Now, back to kicking walls...
*Kicks several walls*
Jipostus: Hey, what's this? *Picks up gem*
Jipostus: My gemology skills say that this is... Red gem... gem... ... ... *Blink* I'M RICH!
*Ascends, and rushes to shop*
Jipostus: How much do i get from this? *Drops red gem*
Waldenbrook: I'll give you 124gp from that.
Jipostus: YOU GOT YOURSELF A DEAL!
*Descenage later*
Jipostus: *Silent laugh* Now, I'll kick so much walls, that I get lots of gems...
*After lots of kicking down walls, and killing of several monsters*
Jipostus: Now... I have... 13 gems... And one crystal... to the shop.
*Ascendage later*
Jipostus: WALDENBROOK! I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YA!
Waldenbrook: Looks like i got myself a gem dealer... *sigh*
Jipostus: Okay, now to business...
*After a while*
Waldenbrook: 1400gp from all your gems!
Jipostus: 2000gp!
*After a longer while*
Waldenbrook: 1600gp!
Jipostus: 1800gp!
*Moment later*
Waldenbrook: 1699gp!
Jipostus: 1701gp!
Both: 1700gp!
Jipostus: DEAL!
Waldenbrook: *sigh*
Jipostus: Now, this crystal...
Waldenbrook: O_O That... That crap? 330gp.
Jipostus: I SAW YOUR FACE! THIS IS MORE VALUABLE THAN 330gp!
Waldenbrook: It's a blessed crystal of fir..
Jipostus: Blessed crystal of fire?
Waldenbrook: SH... I shouldn't have said that...
Jipostus: Now then... How much?
Waldenbrook: 800gp...
Jipostus: DEAL! *Takes money, gives crystal, and goes away*
Waldenbrook: Hehehehehehehe... I got it in half price... Hehehehehe...
*Descendage later*
Jipostus: Hehehehehehehehe... I'm RICH! Hey, a moneybelt? YAY!
*Steps on explosion trap, causing moneybelt to burn*
Jipostus: NOT AGAIN?! DAMMIT! *sigh* maybe I should go and check if Waldenbrook has one...
*Ascendage later*
Waldenbrook: YOU AGAIN?!
Jipostus: Do you have any moneybelts?
Waldenbrook: Oh, I see... There should be one in the corner, 192gp, uncursed.
Jipostus: YOU GOT YOURSELF A DEAL!
Waldenbrook: See you around!
Jipostus: Okay, I'll come later on, when I have more gems and crystals.
Waldenbrook: *sigh* I'm going to bankrupt soon, if it goes like this...
*Descendage later*
Jipostus: Now then... Where's stairs... there?
Ogre: DIEEE!
Jipostus: Hmph!
*Kicks ogre, causing him to trample rocks behind him, and brokes neck*
Ogre: x_x
Jipostus: Cool!
Ogre magus: THAT WAS MY BROTHER! DIEEE!
Jipostus: SHIT!
*Ogre magus casts magic missile, hits rock next to Jipostus, and then hits ogre magus*
Ogre magus: X_X
Jipostus: ...Never cast magic missile while drunk *notes several empty potions of booze behind ogre magus's body* But now, Downstairs, for more walls, and inside them, gems...*Evil, greedy laugh*
How much money does he want, how many walls he has to kick down to achieve his goal, and is this what Ssraxx has planned on him? AND WHY THE HECK I HAVE TO EXPLAIN THIS STUFF? *Flies away*
Writer 1: He left his wallet... I'm RICH!
Writer 2: o_O How come he could fly?
© 2007 Jipostus